Don't Test Time

Playwriting:
Prompt: scene secret wants vs. known wants or something.
-this one needs more work. i like it as a base, but it needs to be fleshed out, sam needs more of a purpose.

Don’t Test Time
(SAM and TIME are in a white room. Time tinkers with a watch while standing behind SAM. SAM is sitting in a chair, sleeping. He wakes, and doesn’t see TIME.)

SAM
What the? Oh my god did I die? I died of boredom!
TIME
Of course not
(SAM shrieks)
What a silly thought.
SAM
Oh my g…
Are you God? Have I taken your name in vain!?
TIME
HAH! No. I’m Time.
SAM
Like Father Time?
TIME
If that’s what you choose. I take on any form your little mind thinks up. Don’t go changing my form mid-visit though. That gets annoying.
SAM
…Do most people see you as an old bearded dude?
TIME
You don’t apparently.
SAM
Too true.
Where are we?
TIME
Not sure, I was hoping you could tell me.
SAM
Me? How would I know?
TIME
We’re in your dream sequence.
SAM
Oh. Why?
TIME
Because you cursed me. You’ve been cursing me a lot lately, Sam.
SAM
You can hear that?
TIME
Not exactly. But I’m not going to explain it to you. We are here to discuss your Time Problems.
SAM
Hah. There’s not enough of it. I swear you fast-forward the little amounts of sleep I get at night. Don’t you?
TIME
Haha! I’ll admit, I’ve done that before. But believe me, I made your day that much better. I’m sure you know the day I’m talking about. Think about it.
SAM
I don’t think…oh, yes, yes I do. That day Yeah.
(Smiles to self, pauses, reflects on that lovely day)
So, wait. If you slow down time, you have to fast forward it too?
TIME
Of course. It has to even out in the end. I’m sure there is some law of physics that explains it.
SAM
How come you never speed it up when I want you to?
TIME
I can’t cater to everyone’s needs, Sam. There are a lot of people in the world. I can’t please you all!
SAM
Okay, okay. I guess not. Can’t you just make more or something? I could really use some extra time for laundry, sleep, grocery shopping…
TIME
What do you think I am? More importantly, what do you think time is made of? Unicorn tears and fairy dust? I can’t just make time. There is only so much of it. A finite number. It’ll eventually run out for you and everyone else. But once someone’s time runs out, it’s transferred to someone else. Sort of recycled. I’m not getting into this with you.
SAM
Well what good are you?
TIME
I help manage time. Allotting it to people, seeding up, slowing down, sharing… it’s a bit like driving on the highway actually.
SAM
I still don’t know why you are even here.
TIME
You keep yelling at me Sam, and it’s really starting to piss me off.
So, stop it. Or I will slow down time every morning you get up at 6 to go to work. And I’ll make it even slower for the first two hours of work. And, as for sleep, well, don’t even get me started; just remember, every time I slow down, somewhere needs to be sped up. I won’t even mention what might happen to your weekends.
SAM
You wouldn’t!
TIME
I would.
So knock it off.
SAM
Okay, okay! I’ve just been so busy.
(Sits on chair, slumps)
TIME
Get yourself a planner. Or an assistant. Or an assistant with a planner. I don’t care. Just stop blaming it on me all the time and not your procrastination.
SAM
Sorry Time. I’ll try not to curse you anymore.
TIME
Good. Thank you. Oh, you might want to wake up now, your boss is coming.
(TIME kicks chair. Sam jumps up as the lights change as BOSS walks onstage. SAM looks at BOSS blankly, as lights fade to black.)